My computer is dying. Bah. I'm not so addicted to blogging anymore. I'm glad about that. We celebrated Pei Ying's birthday on Friday instead of on the real day, Saturday. I bought the cake the day before Friday and brought to school on Friday. Left the cake in the fridge in the ERT room and took it to canteen during recess. We sang the birthday song in the canteen and Pei Ying was surprised. But I can tell that she's happy. For that, I'm happy. =] That's because this is the first year I'm celebrating her birthday with her. The previous years are so much different because I'll just wish her and give her present. It's nice to see people around you being happy. It makes you feel happy too. Oh another stupid thing, I blew her candle for her. =.= No no, not on purpose. It was an accident k? But it was so funny. Haha.

On Saturday, it was so so so fun. Minus the fact that I was moody for some time. The school was so empty. My class was empty too. Only 17 people came out of 33. So we only studied for Accounts. After Accounts, I finished up my Accounts work and then read story book. Then practised singing the patriotic song with Wei Yen, Pei Ying and Fong. That's for Civics but then the teacher didn't come in so we had another 2 free periods. We were singing Sejahtera Malaysia and for some reason, we jumped to The Phantom of The Opera; me and Wei Yen actually. So funny. Haha. Then Eunice, Tze Ni and Kah Mei joined us. We sang some other songs. We didn't really sing a proper song because we didn't know the lyrics of the song. Haha. So we were humming and all. Fun. =]

After recess, we played AEIOU, Simon says, sherade, the passing message game. It was very fun. Tze Ni was so perverted as usual. She gave all those perverted stuff as ideas for charades. (Is that how you spell charades?) The passing message game was so funny. Thanks to Wei Yen and Fong for coming up with weird and long sentences. Haha. Before going back, we played the chicken game. It was so funny. I'm sure everyone had fun yesterday. I know I did. If only we can do that everyday in school, I'll be the first one who wants to go to school everyday.

Me, Pei Ying and June went to the bus stop to wait for bus to Gurney after that. I-Lyn had piano class so she said she would meet us at Gurney. It was so frustrating as the bus didn't come after so long. Pei Ying asked me to be independent and patient. It was raining so heavily and my school bag got wet. The bus came and the bus driver was annoying this time. Rapid. First time to sit Rapid and second time to sit on a public bus in Penang. A very bad bus experience this time. Me and Pei Ying slept in the bus. I'm not sure if June did sleep or was just sitting down there. Instead of going to Gurney, the bus went to so many other places. So we were late to meet up with I-Lyn. The stupid bus stopped at the other side of the road and we had to run to the bus stop which was at the other side of the road. We got all wet and went to the toilet to change. I-Lyn came to meet up with us. Took some pictures but with Pei Ying. Then we went up to the cinema floor to buy tickets. Pei Ying felt insulted when the counter guy said she doesn't look like 12. Haha. Then we went to the food court to eat. The food wasn't bad, I must say. The Korean food is nice. The lady who owns that stall is a Korean lady. Haha. I said 'annyohaseyo' which means hi and 'kamsahamida' which means thank you, to her. She was surprised and asked if I'm a Korean but I said no. Haha. Then we went up to watch the movie, 'Money Not Enough 2'. It was funny and sad. All four of us cried. I-Lyn patted my shoulder when I couldn't stop crying. Haha. And she was so evil because she wanted to take pictures of our red and puffy eyes. Too bad my eyes look normal. Blek. =P

After that, we went back but me and June followed Pei Ying. Pei Ying's dad brought us to Lye Lye coffee shop for dinner. The rain didn't stop. I was feeling hungry but not hungry. I know I'm weird. I wanted to eat something dry and not spicy. I was being so choosy again last night. So I ended up with spagheti. =.= June ate my cucumber and the tomato looked too artificial to be eaten so I left it there. Pei Ying said I looked dead tired and asked if I want to go home to rest. I agreed. June went back to Pei Ying's house. I was supposed to go to her house too but then I was really exhausted so I went back home. I even mopped the floor and did some cooking for mum and bro because mum asked me to. Then I was so emo and moody so I just sat down doing nothing for 2 hours. I wasted my 2 hours just like that and I always complain that I don't have enough time to do this and that. See how pathetic I can be? Ahh, the rest is for me to know.

Today was like normal. Woke up, took bath, ate, tv, and now here. Later gonna tv, do some homework and maybe story book. Depends on my mood. Camp Rock is on Disney later. =P I can't wait. It's surely gonna be 1000 times better than High School Musical. I bet it will. My exams will be starting on the same day as PMR. Wish me luck. 3 weeks of torture. Why on Earth must we sit for exams? Hmm. I wanna do so many things but with my attitude like this, I doubt I can do it. Life is so unfair sometimes. I don't want to complain because I know I'm fortunate compared to others. So I'm being grateful now.

Holidays! Should I be excited? If I should, why am I not thrilled by the thoughts of not having to go to school? I feel normal. Maybe because I still have to go to school as usual. Hmm. Band today was normal except the fact that I'm so soft-hearted towards the members. Wanna faint, go sit. Bahh, whatever. Don't want to think about that now.

So here I am, sitting in front of the computer on a Saturday afternoon, typing this. I'm sorting out my stuff in my computer. Deleting things. Things like songs to be precise. Then I realized that I have so many crappy songs in here. I went through Avril Lavigne's songs and I had headache. Her old album and the new one are so different. Old songs are nice. New songs are.. Bahh. Made me have headache. I didn't really listen to the new album before - The Best Damn Thing. Some of the songs in that album are nice but some are just very disturbing so off they went to the recycle bin. Avril's fans, please don't slaughter me. =.= It's just so amazing how easy it is. Press the 'Delete' button and press 'Enter'. That's all. Whatever information that are useless and unwanted will go into the recycle bin. How I wish we humans work that way. If only I can clear my mind for once, that'll be nice. Really very disturbing. The songs. Omg. =.= I need 'Vincent' now.. Ahhh, much better. =]

I didn't switch on the computer everyday to blog which is good. Ahh, this is Merdeka month. Patriotism is not really my thing. Hmm. Oh and I'm going broke. Yay? =.= This month plus next month. Birthdays are like all coming up in one shot. Don't believe me? See this:

13th Aug : Kah Mei
15th Aug : Guat Phing
22nd Aug : My mum and Kelly =.=
26th Aug : Cynthia
6th of Sept : Pei Ying
9th of Sept : I-Lyn

Just by listing out all the names, the headache has just gotten worse. =.= Sometimes, being too close with people is not good because you have to get them presents on their birthdays. Some say it's the thought that counts, some wants quantity, some wants quality. What the hell? Some are materialistic when it comes to gifts. I mean, we do want the best for our friends but we don't open bank. It's not always about gifts right? Sometimes just a wish and a birthday cake will do. Birthday is just another way to remind you that you're getting older each and everyday. Are gifts so important? I wonder.. I know. Who doesn't like gifts? Everyone does except Bella in The Twilight Saga. =.= She is a weirdo. I can't blame her though. She wants to stay human for a little longer so that she and Edward can have sex in a way to give her pleasure? =.= Never mind. Out of topic. Haha. Hmm. I guess everyone has different perspective about the meaning of birthday and gifts. Maybe to them, gifts are everything? I will never understand.. Anyhow, I'll still give presents to my friends. End of story.

Why do I sound as if I'm frustrated and annoyed? I'm not actually. I'm just looking at the insurance thingy in my drawer. 'Life is great' is printed on the envelope. Yeah, it sure is. Hmm. Never mind. Anyway, my class project is changed again. =.= My fault maybe? But I hope this new class project will show success. Not really sure how to make it work but it has to work. My homework. Presentation. Projects. Are still waiting for me. Sitting at the little corner of my desk. Looking at me and wondering why the hell hadn't I pick any of them up. Ahh, more crapping. Recorder competition is coming. I thought we pulled out but no we did not. =.= I might be playing base. As if my short fingers can reach. =.= Ahh, wonderful. Phone credit dying. Not a surprise. My crazy mum came up with the most 'wonderful' idea ever. She wants to reload RM100 for me per year. =.= Yeah. Take that. That means I'll have to pay myself if I use up the 100 bucks. Hell no. So I'm gonna go argue with her. Soon. Before she reload. Lucky thing mine's prepaid. I used to use postpaid then mum got really angry because I use a lot so she wanted to take away my phone. That was in Standard 6. =.= So I told her not to confiscate my phone if I get straight As for UPSR and yeah, she did not because I scored. Ahh, instead, she changed my number and reload 30 bucks for me per month. Up until now. Still the same. And now she's gonna change that and whatever? Hmm, I haven't been talking to her since a few days ago. When she comes back after work, I'll be in my room. Then she'll go out with my bro for dinner and I'll be alone at home because I've already taken dinner. Almost the same old routine everyday. I know this is wrong but me and my mum just don't bond. We don't say I love you and all to each other. We don't hug each other. She doesn't ask about my school life or what happens in school. All she's concern about is whether I did my chores at home or not. =.= Lack of family love? Maybe. That's why I wonder sometimes, how will I survive without my friends? Pei Ying who always makes me laugh, supports me in a very Peiying-way. Haha. Wei Yen who lends me a shoulder to cry on, listens to my craps, gives me advice. I-Lyn who always says, 'Ca bor!' Haha, always smiling, happy-go-lucky. And many others, like Fong, Jing, Carmen, Kelly, Cynthia, June, Guat Phing, Mei Yen, Michelle. Ahh. They have great qualities. They have their bad side too. But humans are not meant to be perfect no? I'm just glad I have people to stand by me. That's all I know. =] And someone just made a difference in my life. Rainbows. Ahh, yes you. Thanks for being in my life.. My band seniors too. They taught me a lot. I guess we just won't stop learning till the day we die. Learning is a part of life. I see it now.

I just realized that I haven't been coming online for weeks. An improvement isn't it? So much had happened. I'm just gonna crap everything here without pictures because uploading pictures takes up a lot of time. This might be a long post.

I don't even know where to start. Let's see. What about band's HOC? Forget about AGM. Fast forward everything. It's never easy to plan an event and now I know why. A good thing that I get to experience all that myself. Everything went moderately well the other day. Just without the microphone so the performances, especially the singing part by our members couldn't really be heard. I'm so sorry about wasting your Saturday, Wei Yen and Jing. I really love both of you! You people are the best! Thanks to Carmen too and those who came. I have been so so freaking emotional that day. It felt as if I haven't cried for ages and so it had been proven. It felt great to let everything out. Holding back the tears in my eyes is never my thing. I couldn't help it. The seniors performed a few songs for us then we did the same thing back for them. I didn't have stage fright on that day which was a good thing. The funny part was the present giving time. We blind-folded all the seniors and they had to hold an egg, mouth with marshmallow and walked according to the directions given to them. Without the microphone, I had to use my maximum volume to talk to them. My voice was horrible after that and I even had sore throat but it was all worth it although I'll have to admit, the game was pretty lame.

We went to KL to watch KLWMBC on the same day. Right after HOC. We were kinda rushing because we had to leave the school by noon. I didn't want to go but due to some reason, I was forced to go. Fine, I went. The journey in the bus was normal except that Diyana couldn't sleep so she came to my seat. Then K.Gen and K.Asma asked us to sing. That was rather unusual. Then me and Diyana went back to our seats after singing to them. We continued singing till we fell asleep. Lullaby. =] We reached there and caught the semi-finals. I LOVE CHUNG HWA WEI SIN. I'm sorry. Haha. Anyways, it was nice overall. Maybe because we sat at somewhere that we can actually find peace. Me, Ariyani, Diyana and Wahida. Peace lovers. We don't like jerk and psycho. *inner joke* =D We went back to the KL INTERNATIONAL HOTEL after the competition. The hotel, is, let me tell you, so not international-ish. The moment I stepped into the hotel, I was like, 'omg, this is it?' Never mind. Go there and see for yourself. I am so speechless. My room had only one queen size bed and there were 5 people including myself in the room. =.= So me, Diyana and Wahida squeezed in the bed while Hattin and Nadhirah slept on the mattress on the floor. Me and Diyana fell asleep the moment our heads hit the pillow. The rest watched tv and took bath. So I took bath at 1 something and went to bed at 2 something.

The next morning, all of us had to wake up at 7 something for breakfast. The food was.... *SPEECHLESS* The waitress was so freaking rude. Whatever lahh. Then after breakfast, we went to Midvalley to shop. Reached there at about 11 something and shopped till 4 something. I had to lead a group and I chose my group people. My group people are me myself, Ariyani, Diyana, Wahida, Nadhirah, Hattin and Najihah. So me and my 6 anak. Haha. We walked round and round and went for lunch. Spent so long at the food court. Then I bought a pair of slippers there. Then due to some reason, they kept showing me music stuff and alphabets. =.= And everywhere I go, I'll see that too. Bahh. Hmm, fast forward everything. We went to the stadium at 4 something. Sir asked us to rest in the bus first so we did except that me and Diyana did some dares and I couldn't stop laughing. The rest were sleeping. =.= Before going into the stadium, something annoying happened. Not gonna mention what but it was really unexpected. Fine, I can eat alone. Then in the stadium itself, more annoying stuff happened. Didn't really enjoy myself that day. Peace gone. Went back and did the same old thing.

The next day, the whole room overslept. =.= So we went down late for breakfast and all. We stopped at somewhere and me, Diyana, Wahida and Ariyana went to eat KFC. I was laughing like crazy due to some stuff that they said. It wasn't even funny. =.= What was wrong with me? Then more sleeping in bus. Reached school and was happy in a way. More fast forward. Haha

Exams. Tests. Whatever you call it. I finished my second term tests yesterday. So freaking happy! I felt like shouting after the last paper but thanks to my Bio teacher, I didn't. =.= Then, me, Pei Ying and June went to Gurney to watch movie and something else. We watched the latest Mummy movie. One word. Sucks. DO NOT WATCH IF YOU DIDN'T WATCH YET. Wasting money. Disappointing is the word. Didn't expect it to be so lame and all. There weren't even MUMMIES for heaven's sake. China mummies are not counted as mummies. I don't care what the fans of this movie will say to me, but I don't like it. After the movie, we walked around and then went back to Pei Ying's house. My mum came and we went to Queensbay because she wanted to redeem something. Was dead tired when I reached home. Took bath and went online. After so long, finally get to sit down peacefully in front of the computer without worrying about failing exam. =.= Then my mum asked me to finish her other phone's credit. I did something to someone and, haha, I couldn't stop laughing just by thinking about it. So in the end, I slept at 3am yesterday.

Today, I wasted my day sleeping till 1 in the afternoon. =.= Regretted. My day wasted. Sad. Ahh, never mind. Then here I am, sitting here typing this, not having the slightest idea what I'm talking about. I am tired and restless. No idea why am I feeling this way. Anyways, Wei Yen is gonna kill me because I haven't started reading the book she wanted. Another MAJOR THING! I FINALLY BOUGHT BREAKING DAWN!! *chilled* Haha. It came out on the first day of my exam, 6th of August. Then I saw someone brought to school on the 7th. Then I was like, 'Omg! You bought it??' Then Wei Yen came by. I pulled her and told her, 'Wei Yen! Breaking Dawn is out!' Then she was like, 'Ya la. Yesterday came out.' Then I pointed at the book and she was like, 'OMG!! OMG!!' Then we were both shouting and screaming like crazy people. Haha. Soooo, yesterday, went Gurney to buy. I went to Popular first. I asked the person, and he said sold out. I was like, 'OMG SOLD OUT??' Then I started to panic and shouted, 'Pei Ying! June! Where are you?? I'm going MPH now. Go there to meet me!' Then I ran to MPH. =.= I rushed to the information counter and asked, 'Do you have Breaking Dawn?!' Then he pointed to the book in front of me, and I was like, 'YAY! Can I take it?' Then he said, 'Sure. Go ahead.' I took the book and ran to the counter to pay, skipping with joy. I paid and Pei Ying and June came in. Then I skipped and jumped after paying then the counter people called me. They gave me stickers and that thing to pin at somewhere. Haha. I don't know what to call that. YAY! =D Anyways, Wei Yen is gonna kill me. Yay? Haha.

Things that are happening right now are unexpected, surreal even. Confusion and mixed feelings doubled up. It feels wrong yet so right. The feeling is so strong yet so weak. I am stuck here with all the thoughts, dreading to go on with life. Mood swings are occurring more and more frequent. I guess there are more to life than I thought. Different people have different outlooks on life. I guess that's true after all. Happiness is a choice. It really is. I believe it now.